Thursday, July 9, 2009

~cycle-therapy~ making it through the land of wait

I remember the first time I read Oh The Places You'll Go by good ol' Dr. Seuss. When I cam to the waiting page I clearly remember thinking to myself "I will never wait like that...I will be to busy living to even notice waiting!" ha.....oh the thoughts of youth. And now, here I am living in the land of wait on so many levels...trying to remember to live while I wait. trying (sometimes desperately) to hold onto the joy of the moment while I do my very best not to notice every single tick of the clock...

waiting for the house to sell
waiting to travel and visit all our family (its been years)
waiting to move
waiting to find out about my dad's cancer treatment
waiting to start my doula/childbirth prep class business
waiting to open my ETSY fundraiser shop
waiting for hubby to record
waiting to begin our adoption process

waiting....waiting...waiting

In so many ways I have felt like our whole life is on hold...so much hanging on the selling of our house. There are so many things we decided not to do this summer "because our house will sell". And when it sells we will take our children on the much anticipated trip across Canada so that we can visit all of our family in the east who we haven't seen for years. And then we'll move.
But for now...waiting...back to waiting....

So I have decided recently "to hell with waiting!" I HAVE to do something or I am going to loose my mind, literally. I have started making play dates...my kids having sleepovers...saying yes to performance dates....yes to camping trips. If I have to cancel last minute my pep's will understand, heck, they are people who I love and who love me...they see this wacky tortured frame I have been (or maybe not if I'm that good at hiding it).

My hubby says I need to get myself really involved in some kind of Ethiopian Aid organization so that, even though the waiting will continue for a while longer, I can still feel productive. He's right (as usual...he knows me so well) That has been my plan all along but somehow, amidst all this waiting, especially the uncertainty around my Dad, I got sidetracked. So, to all you folks who are on the Ethiopia train, help?? can you share you wisdom? send me links??

Another way I have been making it through...that helps not only me but our children (who reflect my heart and mind so clearly). is to bike. It is physical activity, it is challenging....we breathe in the beautiful, clean air and are lifted by the very action. If ever there is a moment when we are out of balance we hop on the bikes and by the time we get home there is a calm that remains with us for the rest of the day.
How do you cope with waiting? How do you get through those challenging moments that are completely out of our hands? (or, at least it appears that way)

Willow and Noah peeking from within their snazzy ride


enjoying a romp in the greenbelt..a wonderful biking destination

6 comments:

Sha Zam- said...

Jenn.
Hello this is Shannon. I love this post! Now I've got to add it to my blog list and get caught up on you and your litter of kidds! :)

First- the Ethiopian Adoptive Families forum is a forum, by invite only, set up as a cross bt FB and a forum type. It is great cause it is people from across agencies... not just your own. And it is small right now, and it makes it easy to make friends.

Ok- to answer your blog question... how to regain balance. Thanks for asking... my head is reeling- my nerves all worked up- and that is what I need to do. I go outside and hike. Till I get tired. It is not the same as a "walk for excercise when I can where my ipod." these time require no extra stimulation.. leaves, frogs, trees, rocks, my dog, my feet, my god. That's it. I swear its like a drug they haven't invented!

Sha Zam- said...

Also Jenn. Let me know if you want an invite to that forum. You'll need to send me your email. You can private email me at gon_hikn93@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

I don't have an answer for that question. I don't cope well with waiting. =[

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

Way to refocus your life, Jenn! And inspirational to the rest of us waiting for things . . . or just trying to LIVE.

* said...

I like the question you pose here about waiting.

There's a quote I came across years ago about living our lives through the questions until some distant day in the future, the answer unfolds for us, sometimes without us every realizing it. That is how I try and wait. But chocolate, yoga and quiet time (reading & writing) also help. And plenty of hugs & kisses.

{and thanks for visiting my blog...stop by for chocolate chip waffles anytime!}

Gretchen said...

"This is a special bike that's not very good at listening to excuses, so it takes you exactly where you want to go & if you kick & scream it makes you pedal harder and go up steeper hills until you're too out of breath to complain & after awhile, if you're lucky, you start to see that it doesn't really matter if you laugh or cry, because it just wants to ride... like the wind...."
- Brian Andreas