Friday, April 30, 2010

~dream a little dream of you~

I dreamt that we got "the call" the other night.  

our worker said "I have your referral for you" 

my breathe caught, all I could manage was a pathetic "yes?"  

"well," she said. "they are 9 year old twin girls!"

Friday, April 16, 2010

~because everyone needs a *pout* post~

Today I pack the kitchen. Actually we pack the kitchen...thankfully my kids are all over the packing thing. This is a VERY good thing because right now I feel like there is so much "work" happening and so much burnt out mama (with daddy already in our new town) that there are few moments when they can really get into engaged in the moment rather then doing chores or being sent outside so that they don't destroy the house....which they do of course, even though the house is nearly empty. how? ((sigh)) We did go to town the other day (Thanks Heidi!) and get a bunch of art supplies, so we have been art-ing it up....getting out all our stuff...yay water colours!

I am thanking Heidi because she is amazing. You see, our Rav4 broke down...blow engine and all, and so I have been here with no vehicle, my suburban in Mountain Home with hubby, for 2 weeks. (we live 20 minutes from town...) Heidi and her fab hubby lent me their van this week. I LOVE that van. I LOVE Heidi and her man for coming to my rescue...being my full on knight in shinning blue armour. I can't even express it...really...speachless.

Did I mention moving is really challenging?? I'm sure you all know that but I thought I would re-iterate. MOVING.SUCKS.

Even this the place we've always wanted to live. To a place where we can settle and hunker down and just be for the next 50 years or so. even still moving is hard.

Around here it seems that the kids are taking turns having melt downs. Eden sobbing..although she can't seem to name why. Willow sobbing because she wants her care bear, which happens to be already in the storage unit in Mountain Home. Alden getting all bent out of shape because he can't swim the lake I mean, because, apparently in his mind its warm enough. And then there's Noah, who is sweet as a peach...except when he's yelling or sobbing for any and all reason...thrown off because daddy's not her (for the first time ever) and because our house is nearly empty. you should have seen those big rolling tears when we packed up his bed. So sad. even though he doesn't sleep in said bed, even though he rarely ever even plays on said bed. Big tears. ((sigh)) And me?? well, all it took was my husbands voice to set the tears free yesterday.

"I hate this" I say
he's smiling, I can hear it through the phone.

"Yes," he says. "buts its so beautiful here Jenn. I walk down the street and everyone is smiling at each other...beautiful!"

"buts this is so hard" I choke *sniff*

"I'll be home tomorrow. And in 1 week we'll be here. you'll love it Jenn, it gets better everyday!"


"I know"


a part of me is feeling like this is really unfair! wants to pout like a spoiled three year old. He's there, staying in a nice hostel, working, eating meals I cooked for him last week, skyping us and then watching movies, walking around the super cool town seeing all the super cool stuff thats happening. Working at a job he loves with people he really likes. (alone, which sucks. alone sucks too...must remember that)

I'm here, packing the house. taking care of the kiddos, cleaning, cooking, cleaning, packing, cleaning, trying to be a parent who still remembers how to parent (aka speaking not yelling).

yes...this is my pout post. my bottom lip out, forehead creased in displeasure post. If there was a "stomp foot" button I would use it. over and over.

I am REALLY looking forward to being "home". Did I mention we still haven't found a house?? And yet we are moving 'cause we're crazy like that and apparently moving 4 hours away while home schooling 4 kids isn't adventurous enough for us! *twitch* *twitch*

but hey, it sunny. thank you universe for the sunshine!!! I think I might be a big puddle of mush if it were cloudy too.

I'm needing some of ^this^ right now!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

~because he is so cute!~

This little man is on his way to his new home.